Small steps in faith

Thursday, March 31, 2005

Loving touch

When we honestly ask ourselves which person in our lives means the most to us, we often find that it is those who,instead of giving advice,solutions, or cures, have chosen rather to share our pain and touch our wounds with a warm and tender hand

Henri Nouwen

Tuesday, March 29, 2005

Update on Kristen

Well I've talked to Kristen twice now She's having a good time She says it's beautiful in California and we should go on a family trip(so she doesn't have to spend her money:) Things are expensive there They are in an upscale area and things in the shops are $200- 300 They took a trolley to Manhattan beach They plan to go to the gateway of LA where Rodeo drive,etc is on Wed Kristen is staying in a hotel with the Young Americans and I guess Bob Dylan's daughter is staying in her room I bet she could tell some interesting stories :) Even though I wasn't for her going on this trip I'm actually glad she went It will make her senior year very memorable for her

Monday, March 28, 2005

Empty nest

It's 3 am no one is up except me I can't sleep It's raining
It's going to be a long night and a long week ...I miss Kristen :(

Sunday, March 27, 2005

True meaning of Life

He is not here ; he has risen! Remember how he told you, while he was still with you in Galilee? The Son of Man must be delivered into the hands of sinful men, be crucified and on the third day be raised again "
Luke 24: 6-7

Saturday, March 26, 2005

SometimesYou Can't Make it On Your Own

I love this song

Sometimes You Can't Make it On Your Own

Tough, you think you’ve got the stuff
You’re telling me and anyone
You’re hard enough

You don’t have to put up a fight
You don’t have to always be right
Let me take some of the punches
For you tonight

Listen to me now
I need to let you know
You don’t have to go it alone

And it’s you when I look in the mirror
And it’s you when I don’t pick up the phone
Sometimes you can’t make it on your own

We fight all the time
You and I… that’s alright
We’re the same soul
I don’t need… I don’t need to hear you say
That if we weren’t so alike
You’d like me a whole lot more

Listen to me now
I need to let you know
You don’t have to go it alone

And it’s you when I look in the mirror
And it’s you when I don’t pick up the phone
Sometimes you can’t make it on your own

I know that we don’t talk
I’m sick of it all
Can - you - hear - me – when – I -
Sing, you’re the reason I sing
You’re the reason why the opera is in me…

Where are we now?
I’ve got to let you know
A house still doesn’t make a home
Don’t leave me here alone...

And it’s you when I look in the mirror
And it’s you that makes it hard to let go
Sometimes you can’t make it on your own
Sometimes you can’t make it
The best you can do is to fake it
Sometimes you can’t make it on your own


Friday, March 25, 2005

"It Is Finished"

"Later, knowing that all was now completed, and so that the Scripture would be fulfilled, Jesus said, "I am thirsty".... When he had received the drink, Jesus said, "It is finished" With that he bowed his head and gave up his spirit" John 28,30

For me, this is a day of reflection and prayer A day to remember
I'm reading a small devotional book called "Deeper Walk A Relevant Devotional Series" It has thoughts from a lot of the contributors to Relevant Magazine I thought the following was appropriate for today

Nothing Left
Jason Johns

"There is nothing left to do

Hanging on the cross, Jesus did all that needed to be done. He finished the work of salvation once and for all, He has made us perfect, We are complete. We are whole,

There is nothing left to do,

But it is finished, There is no sacrifice left for us to bring. Our efforts are not the issue. We are whole in Christ, Can we rest in his love?

There is nothing left to do

Resting in Him is not a license to ignore the needs of others, to grow lazy, to shun the calling of God on our life. It is and invitation from a loving God to "seek first the Kingdom of God," We can rest and step into His Kingdom

There is nothing left to do

Take time to reflect today on just how much God really loves you

Wednesday, March 23, 2005

Preparing for California and letting go

Last night was a tough night at our house Kristen is going to Los Angeles California for spring break She leaves Sat and I think we're all having our own struggles with this
Things needed to be said that Kristen had a hard time hearing and we had a hard time telling her We love her and she knows that
I know this is part of my hearts preparation for letting her go to college in the fall and its hard ...the hardest thing I've been through
Keep all of us in prayer

Tuesday, March 22, 2005

Take time to worship

"To understand God is impossible ... to worship Him is imperative"

This is Holy Week
I heard on the radio how there were people retracing the steps of Jesus in Jerusalem I thought how cool that would be to be able to do that physically
I would love to go to the Holy Land someday
I realized though that it's just as important to retrace those steps in your mind as well
Read your bible, watch "Passion of the Christ", fast, pray , create your own time of worship to remember especially this week why Christ came to this earth
Don't get so caught up in your "busyness and stress and struggles" that you lose your focus of this important week

Sunday, March 20, 2005

K2 Unplugged

Our youth group had an awesome worship experience tonight
Praising God with song and word and prayer If you ever want to feel the presence of the Holy Spirit you just need to come to K2 at Southwest and his presence will totally surround you in the hearts of teenagers who are sold out for God

Saturday, March 19, 2005

From a mother's heart

I have a heavy heart for 2 sets of parents tonight

The first are Jessica Lunsford's parents (the 9 yr old Florida girl who was kidnapped and murdered) I can only relate from being a mother and having a daughter and it breaks my heart that any parent has to go through the horrible pain of losing a child to such a monstrous inhuman act of violence

The second are Terri Schiavo's parents I can't imagine being told that you have to watch your child starve to death It's unbelievable to me that any medical person could remove her tube and have any kind of conscience I've been a bedside nurse for 22 years I've cared for many patients who were dying but I thank God I never had to deal with this type of situation

Only God can heal the broken hearts in these situations

Friday, March 18, 2005

Inner light

I've been "spiritually dry" the last few days This morning at work I was looking at a book that I give my patients called "Meditations on Diabetes Strenthening Your Spirit In Every Season" It has some beautiful uplifting thoughts but these were two of my favorites

"People are like stain glass windows;they sparkle and shine when the sun is out, but when the darkness sets in, their true beauty is revealed only if there is a Light within"Elizabeth Kubler-Ross

Faith is a bird
Which feels the light
And sings in the dark
Before the dawn

Wednesday, March 16, 2005

Approval Addiction

This was in my morning devotion

"Many of my daily preoccupations suggest that I belong more to the world than to God. A little criticism makes me angry... a little praise raises my spirits.. often I am like a small boat on the ocean, completely at the mercy of the waves."
Henri Nouwen

I think its easy to fall into this I know I find myself here often instead of looking to God

"But with me it is a very small thing that I should be judged by you..It is the Lord who judges me" 1Corinthians 4:3-4

Remember who's opinion really matters :)

Monday, March 14, 2005

Back in Ohio

Well I'm back in Springboro My plane got in yesterday afternoon at 4:30 and Darrell and Zach were waiting for me Unfortunately my suitcase wasn't so I spent 30 min in line with everyone else on my flight Who knows where our suitcases went Maybe Hawaii I was glad to see it on my doorstep early this morning though Darrell,Zach, and Tyler bought welcome home flowers for Kristen and I Kristen spent the weekend with Jeff and Barefoot in Illinois at a youth camp She got back about 8:15 So we're all back home where we belong for at least 2 weeks until Kristen heads to California with her friend Kari on spring break Just a preview of what my next four years are going to be like I'm sure
It's such a pretty morning here God definitely worked on my heart when I was away Peeled away some of the layers that I had let build up Hopefully I'll be able to keep the "weeds" from growing back up :) I finished the David Crowder book "Praise Habits" If you like the Psalms and you like humor you'll love this book It's a very easy book to get into I started a book called "Stumbling Toward Faith" by Renee Altson, not an easy book to read It's difficult to read about someone's pain I find it interesting that she changed her name Her therapist recommended Renee She just needed to have her whole life wiped clean Read the book and you'll understand why Betrayal by family and by "church family" She has poetry in her book I'm beginning to take an interest in poetry I was in a bookstore in Vermont and for some reason I was drawn to that section
FYI - Mike Box (if you read this) Billy Corgan(Smashing Pumpkins) has written a book of poetry called "Blinking with Fists" There's a review in the hard copy(not web site)of Relevant Magazine I don't much care for their music but I really liked his poetry odd huh?

wants of some desires

I'm given to wants of some desires
And given to wants of none at all
For fires consumed burn ever so bright
Unable to be drenched in the place of my soul

From a drowsy spot just on the other side of sleep
Did you dream well, as I did of another
And another time altogether?
Lay such hand upon my brow
And take me with you as you leave

For some light must penetrate old shadows
And I want you with sword in hand
To cross left over right, dark over night
You over me, me under you

A confessor once spoke kind
That he loved all that he abhorred
For it kept him fixed in a place beyond nature
But things do shift, and that same confessor
Confesses to you
That my love,
As it once loved
Loves no more

Billy Corgan

I think because I've read so many of the Psalms lately it's drawn me to poetry Anyway I plan to go to the library to check out some of the books I looked at
Don't have to be back at work until Wed

Sunday, March 13, 2005

Going home to love others

It's a beautiful sunny day here in Vermont I'm hoping for the same in Philadelphia and Dayton on my trip home
We ate at a nice pizza inn last night "All fired up" Their pizza is very different It's pie style but the crust is wood fired and thinner I liked it LaRosa's would probably be the closest to what it tastes like My sister and I watched 2 movies I wouldn't recommend either one "Wicker Park" with Josh Hartnett (he was really the only good thing in the movie :) The other one is called "Shaun of the Dead" It's a BBC version of "Dawn of the Dead" movies I actually saw all of the originals in the 70's/80's and remember liking them but I didn't care for this one My sister did though She loves English humor
I've been studying 1John through my Beth Moore bible study this week
I've had some struggles with "how to love difficult people" God made it clear to me this morning that I'm not relying enough on his supply of "agape love" I've been going on my own "phileo" love and it's run pretty dry :) along with my patience
I just needed a reminder that it's not about me :)

Saturday, March 12, 2005

Snow Snow Snow

It has snowed the entire day here Things don't slow down like they do in Ohio though :)
I went to my sister's church last night They had a dinner and a "prayer journey" It was very spiritual Different prayer stations set up with different ways to express your prayers and thoughts My favorite was the finger labyrinth and the centralized prayer You pick a word that has meaning to you ie God,Jesus,Spirit,pray and use that word to draw you back into your prayer if you feel your mind wander The room was lit only with candles and celtic type music in the background There was also one of those miniature "water flowing over the rocks" things I'm not sure what you call it but it gives you a calm peace when you're sitting there listening to it When you were done praying you could go up and light a candle for your prayer requests
I went snowmobiling for the 1st time today We went about 50 miles on the trails It was absolutely beautiful You go through woods and it's all pine trees with snow My brother-in law let me drive for about 10 min I much prefer to ride on the back and let him drive:)
I come back home tomorrow afternoon I've had a wonderful time here but I do miss my family alot so it will be good to come home :)

Friday, March 11, 2005

My second day in Vermont

It's still cold here but sunny which is a nice change from Dayton We spent yesterday in alot of the little shops in Montpelier They have the coolest book stores Very small and unique Montpelier is the state capitol so there are alot of people there through the day and then they leave in the evening They have alot of local artists who sell things in the local shops We drove in my brother-in-law's Audi since my sister's tire was still being fixed He has a really
nice car We're back in my sister's car today We plan to go to Stowe,Vermont today I guess it's known for it's skiing but I'm not a skiier :) We also plan to go to the original Ben and Jerry's factory I do like ice cream so that should be nice and fattening :)
My sister goes to a Presbyterian church and they're having a prayer labyrinth tonight along with dinner so I will get to meet alot of her friends as well as the female half of her pastor team It's a husband and wife and I met her husband yesterday Picture Kenny Loggins in his 30's and that's her pastor :) He was Mr. Mom yesterday at the "Mom's playgroup" They have an 18 month old named Levi (what a cool bible name ) or maybe it's after the jeans :)
Tomorrow is my first experience on a snowmobile ! I still haven't seen a moose

Thursday, March 10, 2005


I'm sitting here looking out my sister's back window at snow and mountains and sun It's very beautiful here even if it is 0 degrees with about 3 ft of snow on the ground You definitely have to be a winter person to live here year around I don't think the snow ever melts
My flights were very smooth yesterday but when my sister and I left Starbucks to go to her house we felt this rough wobbling It was a flat tire ! Luckily her husband only works about 10 min from where we were Unfortunately he wasn't able to get one of the bolts off and it had to be towed If you have to have a flat tire my sister is a fun person to have it with :) It should be fixed by today If you know my sister this is just typical for her She is always having something happen with her car Driving is not her strong point! Anyway we're not letting this put a damper on our plans
We ate at a really nice inn-like restaurant last night The food was like City Barbecue They had the most amazing sweet potato fries
Our plans are to go to Montpelier today This is where all the shops and "interesting people" hang out I love maple sugar and this is where they make it so my sister has promised to take me to "The Sugar Shack" :)
If anyone doubts that God created nature they need to come to Barre Vermont:) I'm still waiting to see a moose

Wednesday, March 09, 2005

It's here!

In 4 hours I get on a plane to Philadelphia and then to Burlington Vermont to see my sister and her family I'm excited I haven't seen them since Thanksgiving I've seen pictures of their house but I've never actually been there I'm looking forward to seeing a different part of the United States It looks like I'll need my winter coat and boots They've had snow the last 2 days It's nothing for them to get 6 or 7 inches I already miss my family but it will make me love and appreciate them more

Tuesday, March 08, 2005

Points to Ponder

My friend from work sent these to me They make you think :)

Points to Ponder!

Only in drugstores make the sick walk all the way to the back of the store to get their prescriptions while healthy people can buy cigarettes at the front.

Only in people order double cheeseburgers, large fries, and a diet coke. !

Only in banks leave both doors open and then chain the pens to the counters.

Only in we leave cars worth thousands of dollars in the driveway and put our useless junk in the garage.

Only in we buy hot dogs in packages of ten and buns in packages of eight.

Only in we use the word 'politics' to describe the process so well: 'Poli' in Latin meaning 'many' and 'tics' meaning 'bloodsucking creatures'.

Only in they have drive-up ATM machines with Braille lettering.


Why the sun lightens our hair, but darkens our skin?

Why women can't put on mascara with their mouth closed?!

Why don't you ever see the headline "Psychic Wins Lottery"?

Why is "abbreviated" such a long word?

Why is it that doctors call what they do "practice"?

Why is lemon juice made with artificial flavor, and dish washing liquid made with real lemons?

Why is the man who invests all your money called a broker?

Why is the time of day with the slowest traffic called rush hour?

Why isn't there mouse-flavored cat food?

Why didn't Noah swat those two mosquitoes?

Why do they sterilize the needle for lethal injections?

You know that indestructible black box that is used on airplanes? Why don't they make the whole plane out of that stuff?!

Why don't sheep shrink when it rains?

Why are they called apartments when they are all stuck together?

If con is the opposite of pro, is Congress the opposite of progress?

If flying is so safe, why do they call the airport the terminal?

Monday, March 07, 2005

There's no place like home

I am very much a homebody
I love the security of being somewhere I feel loved and protected I love spending time with my family here I love spending time with my friends here I love spending time with God here I even love spending time alone doing nothing
I'm getting ready to leave for Vermont to visit my sister and her family this week for 5 days and I'm starting to get homesick even before I've left
I'm excited to spend time with my sister I'll have a good time but I know when Sun morning comes I'll be ready to come back because there's no place like home :)

Friday, March 04, 2005

This is your life

"Don't close your eyes
This is your life
Are you who you want to be?"

On my way to work this morning I saw a beautiful sunrise and this song by Switchfoot was playing God talking to me :)
I am who I want to be but there's definitely room for growth and improvement and I feel blessed to be where I am today

Thursday, March 03, 2005

In His Prayers

"The final prayer of Jesus was about you His final pain was for you His final passion was for you Before he went to the cross he went to the garden And when he spoke with his Father, you were in his prayers...." Max Lucado

This week I have felt the strong pull to pray for certain people in my life I don't think I do it as often as I need to ( God has picked 2:00 am to remind me :) I can't change circumstances but I can pray about them and God can change them Christ prayed for us He is our example Take time today to pray for someone special in your life who's struggling It makes a difference in your life as well as theirs

Wednesday, March 02, 2005

God's guidance

I liked this definition of God's guidance "movements of the soul--thoughts,feelings, or desires--given to us by God."
Listen for God's voice
He wants to talk to you

Tuesday, March 01, 2005

Praise Habit

Do you give praise for everything that you do? I know I don't Alot of times I'm on autopilot going through my day-not a good thing I've just started reading David Crowder's new book "Praise Habit Finding God in sunsets and sushi"

"When good is found and we embrace it with abandon, we embrace the Giver of it. This book explores that journey. This book is written in hopes that you begin to find God everywhere. Yes, in church on Sunday at 9:00 a.m., but also in the seemingly mundane. In traffic on Tuesday at 5:15 p.m.. In a parent-teacher meeting. In the colors of a sunset. On the other end of a tragic phone call. Every second is an opportunity for praise. There is a choosing to be made. A choosing at each moment. This is the Praise Habit. Finding God moment by revelatory moment. In the sacred and mundane, in the valley and on the hill, in triumph and in tragedy, and living praise erupting because of it. This is what we were made for."

That last sentence really hit me (at 2:30 in the morning) I'm not doing what I was made for enough I tend to complain instead of praise I need to do a better job Sometimes it just takes a wake-up call at 2:30 am :)

8 days and counting until I go to Vermont :)